Monday, May 23, 2005

"Get OUT of ATL"!!!

Get OUT of ATL…….

Ok this all took place about a week ago but we have a schedule on this show and Damnit we are going to stick to it!

Well “The Brit” has become a part of the show in the last 5 years or so, he and Red did Undergrad together and we were introduced on one of our road trips to ole “Hot Lanta”, at any rate “Brit” and I have become really cool over the years and have seen each other through some pretty interesting moments, he hails to us from the fabulous United Kingdom by way of Jamaica and somewhere in the 5 boroughs. Everyone it is my pleasure to introduce you all to the intricate and witty friend to the show……”The Brit”

(Audience screams) “Good Day Bloke”!!!

So last Friday I get a call from “The Brit” @ 7am, it runs me low that you people know that I’m in the office that early, bigger than that you guys know that my lines are free to get the latest updates and dramas around the country and abroad. So “Brit” who currently resides in Atlanta was in the middle of telling me a story about a friend in NYC who happens to know of a new associate recently hired in “Brit’s” office. Immediately my boy is warned to stay away from this dude and not to let “the newbie” in any of his business.
(Sidebar: It amazes me that no matter when you go the queers are so well connected, I guess I do this all the time and don’t realize it but a friend can drop the name of someone 3,000 miles away and I will be able to give you their mama’s maiden name along with their last 5 sexual partners it is so good to be in the know…...End sidebar)

“Brit” takes the warning seriously and keeps his distance….However, one morning while my boy was actually jumping in his ride to head out of the office parking lot “Newbie” just so happened to be pulling into the parking lot right next to “Brit”. “Newbie” rolls down his window and greets my boy and then hands his cell phone to “The Brit”. Now anyone would think that this is fairly out of the ordinary but there is nothing to go on so naturally he takes the phone and looks at the display to his shock and surprise he reads the name of his ex “Crazy Bitch 404”. I tell you my boyz are as gracious as they come…”Brit” simply hands the phone back to “Newbie” and says…”My business is my business…Have a great day”!
Jumps back in his car and pulls out, now of course within minutes I’m on “Da Man’s Line” aka “The work phone” getting the story fresh from the source…

Now:

1. Why are the kids in Atlanta so fierce?
2. What would make “Newbie” think that is was okay to approach my boy that way?
3. What the hell is in the water in Atlanta and why are all the boyz so fukkin crazy!
4. Is Atlanta Spanish for “Bunch O’ Black Sissies and the women who love them”?

This is probably the reason why Red and I can only deal with that city for a window of 48 hours. We keep “The Brit” in our prayers and we beg you to keep drinking bottled water baby!

For more information and questions on Atlanta please visit: www.welcometoatlanta.com or here
Happy Monday!

3 Comments:

Blogger ..Sue...Zette... said...

LMAO...you are a hot mess...lmao

2:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm, Hotlanta, Atlanta, A hot mess! This is the land of "The Children of the Corn" note my use of corn as an appropriate metaphor. If you happen to live in Altanta and reading this, please be certain that your man is not in residence. If you don't catch him with engine running on the entrance ramp from out of town, then please, by all means,cancel Christmas and call over teh pyschologist, Paxil is in demanD!!!:). I think its time to heed the advice and "Get out of ATL." Decorum is such a blessing!

11:11 PM  
Blogger the young people's professor said...

LOLOLOL, and the kids of up here thing thaT HOTLANTA is the SHIT. That's the crazy part! I wonder if the kids down there have the same thing to say about NEW YORK!?

3:36 AM  

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